When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize