I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
Randomize
