I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
Randomize
