To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
I want Samuel L. Jackson to stand beside me and narrate my morning shits.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
Randomize
