i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
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