I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
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