so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
Randomize