Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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