Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
just got out of a noise viloation because the cop recognized my roomate as his favorite chipotle burrito roller. just another reason I love ritos
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
My dad just asked Siri to "help me find my daughters dignity."
If you were my daughter, I'd do the same thing.
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
I'm always down for nudity.
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