Whod you bang
I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
Randomize
