That cute girl I hooked up with last night clawed my back to hell and gave me a hickey. I look like a white trash warewolf victim
i think i have herpe
just one?
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
Randomize
