Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
Sorry, Geoff can’t come to his phone right now. He’s outside trying to show his dick to a bachelorette party bus with “DTF” written on the windows
Randomize