you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
