there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
Randomize
