So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize
