At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
she went home with me because she said i reminded her of paul rudd. remind me to thank him for his awkwardness
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
Randomize
