Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
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