even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
Randomize
