Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
Thats the last time im "arresting" you to get out of paying your bar tab.
What?! The only reason I married your sister is to have a Cop in the family!
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
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