That's when you crack a 10am beer
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
I can feel your judgement through the phone
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