That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
Randomize
