yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
either way he was missing a nipple.
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
NoShamevember. You game?
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
Help me help you realize you are a moron
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
Randomize
