No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
Randomize