How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
You are a booty call, not a friend.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Randomize
