You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Randomize
