Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
I woke up this morning with a half eaten bagel and an empty pack of imitation crab meat in my bed. This is going to be my response to pick up lines now.
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
Randomize
