I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
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I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
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