Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
What's the point of bringing a Jack and Coke to work if my boss is just gonna piss and moan about me day drinking again?
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
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