Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
Randomize
