She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
It's rum buckets o'clock
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
Randomize
