Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
Randomize
