you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
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