I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
Randomize
