his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
