out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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