Capitaan dildo arrescate!
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
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