operation harelip BJ is a go
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
the room spins SO much faster in panama
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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