I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
Holy shit dude........stairs
Randomize
