I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
Hey did you take a shower last night at like 4am?
"ummm...." (Thinking in my head) wet towel, soaking wet hair, clean pjs on backwards... "that would make more sense then what I thought happened..."
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
