Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
Randomize
