thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
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