Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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