You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
Randomize
