Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
Surefire way to sober up: discover that your car is being towed at 2 am.
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
Randomize
