Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Randomize