I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
Both the cop and the paramedic were hitting on me while I was on the ambulance. My boob fell out and they just about had full on erections right there. They Came back two hours later to sign my cast with their phone numbers. #stillhotwhilebleeding
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
Randomize