I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
Two words: nipple clamps
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