Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
Randomize
