The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
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Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
You can't just leave with hair like that
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
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So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
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