how hairy? two words: wookie tits
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
